B面絲絨—Sumika寫給Jobson未寄之信系列 B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika (6 August, 2013)

B面絲絨Sumika寫給Jobson寄之信系列 B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika (6 August, 2013) 

B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika B面絲絨—未寄之信系列】 

 

親愛的Jobson,

 

接續上一封7/16手寫的信,今天,我來到同樣的地方,坐在同一張桌子前,一樣會把我皮膚曬得通紅的大片落地窗玻璃旁,寫信給你。除了Paul Auster那本書,還多了上一封未完的內容,而字跡已填滿正反面的A4紙。不同的是,在這片面向小山丘與夕陽方向的窗前,上一次提筆,我還不知道奧斯特Auster這個字的意涵,而現在我已明白,auster指的是〝南方〞。想必,這應該是準備回國的浪子心之所向,是候鳥歸回的方向。

在《孤獨及其所創造的》第二部〈記憶之書〉裡,我讀到有關幻肢的內容時,想起自己曾寫過一篇文字,也提到這種幻肢之痛:〈邊界素寫〉,處於某種邊境的感懷,而想要寄給你看。也想問你,在等待啓航的候機室裡,可也有過逃亡者、流浪者的心情?

有一種空間,也像機場的存在。此刻,我就待在這樣的空間,醫院內的一處咖啡座,介於什麼之間的存在…。另一頭,是名符其實的戰場,迎生送終;而這一端,休戰、喘息;或者假象太平的慰藉空間;或者,是幸運如我,因為西線無戰事了,而安安於重回紅塵之前的,這個寧靜時空。放任陽光,放任蕨類綠滿遍野,放任自己擁有、投入寫信抒懷的字裡行間,而時光,忙碌匆匆不待我的時光,繼續消逝它的分分秒秒,在這個邊界空間,我放任自己凝固我的時光,停止不前的pause,任憑意識流動滑出筆尖,而絲絨組曲一首接唱一首,與陽光照射的角度漸移漸昇漸熱,還有窗外的風動影搖與人車來來往往…,都是為了對照我的真空狀態:這個我無法自己看見的身軀形影與心靈,凍結如冰塊,透明沒有雜念俗務;沁涼,來自於安篤放心。我逃亡在這難得短暫的幸福時空,在一切融化消失之前。

當陽光從天花板旁高窗射在我桌前,一道白光劃分桌子的中央——像最適合咖啡成長的赤道—南北迴歸線的equator zone——我想到,不勞而獲與單純的幸福,是那麼難得,讓人嫉妒。因為人世間似乎一切都必須交換才能有所得。當陽光多到傷害我了,我面臨選擇遮蔽它也同時遮去(失去)眼前的動感生命的窗景。當然,這種種細瑣,to see or not to see,微不足道,相對於咖啡座落地窗另一頭上演著的to live or to die那些戲碼,由得己的選擇總是幸福許多,很多。

就好像,在丈量生命的尺度中,最大的尺度,是死亡。只要是被劃分在死亡區域——Dead Zone——以外的,再平凡細微,也都能彰顯出那毋庸懷疑的幸福確是真實的幸福。

在上一次回診之後,我竟再也沒有翻開《孤獨及其所創造的》這本書,沒有寫下那封信未完的部分,一直到今天。三週的空白或者充實。打開書頁,走進房間,文字、 絲絨組曲和與你的malalikap,就是這段之間的生命實態。你又讀了幾本小說,我又看了幾部深刻的影片,也確信自己更老花,而開始失智,而你的生命將更圓融智慧而寬宏,而更具魅力了!

儘管這個非比非此的之間的時空,寧靜而幸福,我卻也不渴望時時回到這裡耽溺沉醉。一如我對我的主治醫師說的話,最好我一年只來看他一次。在我開始羅列出我生命中那些關鍵詞,寫下記憶之書的故事以前,我還是闔上書本,離開房間,去過有你、有絲絨組曲和與你malalikap的文字、心靈交流的真實喜悅生活吧。

 

Sumika

 

 

♫*♥*•ღ♫••**ღ¨♥*••♫•♥*ღ♫••¨*♥*♫*ღ•¨*♥*•ღ♫•♥*¨*♫

精選1

A Visit to Newport Hospital (by British progressive band Egg, from their third album “The Polite Force”, released in 1971.)

The song “A Visit to Newport Hospital" tells the story of the band’s origin. In the Wikipedia, about this song and the British progressive band:

“It is often regarded as the band’s best work and displays an advance in compositional maturity which moves away from the lingering psychedelic-pop sensibilities of their debut album toward a more avant-garde instrumental approach. The music is a fine example of early English progressive rock.”

Master Jobson's VU Suites

Coincidence Has Its Own Meaning

A Visit to Newport Hospital" was selected as the 10th track by Jobson in one of his early works of VU Suites: “Encore—Band On The Run Suite”, title named by Sumika when she heard for the first time this VU Suite broadcasted during 28 Oct. to 3 Nov. 2012. It becomes the 17th VU Suite of Jobson’s musical works, counted by Sumika too, also equal to the future “Encore little boy—Confession Suite”, renamed by Sumika several years later. Jobson told Sumika at the beginning of August 2013 that after the broadcasting, this suite would be taken in pieces. The next broadcasting in 2014 was at the 35th week, then in 2015 at the 40th week, until then, it was still intact. Jobson didn’t renamed it.

This VU Suite was broadcasted at the week of 4 Aug. to 10 Aug. 2013, while Sumika wrote the letter to Jobson (but unsent, see above) in a Hospital near Taipei on 6 August, 2013.

In this VU Suite, the word “Confession” appears two times, the first time appeared in the lyrics of “Busted”, and the second time is in the last song “Confession”. That’s another reason why Sumika changed the title of this suite in “Encore little boy—Confession suite”.

For Sumika, Jobson has a pure little boy’s heart with pure and simple belief of music. Because, when Jobson talks about music with Sumika, he return to a little boy, his mind is full with enthusiasm for many types of music such as art rock, blues, prog rock, bossa nova, metal, nu-jazz, black metal… enjoyable to share with others. He use the image of the little boy (from the cover image of the album “The Hurting”) for his personal facebook Jobson Hiiao. “Encore Little Boy” and “The Hurting”, are titles that Sumika always feels sad, not only for the result of the lawsuit between J-Rock Company and Eslite Corporation, but especially, Sumika feels so heartbreaking for an unexpected end between Jobson and her.

The album “The Hurting” was remastered and reissued in 1999, and included four remixes as bonus tracks and an extensive booklet with liner notes about the album’s creation. A 30th Anniversary reissue was released on 21 October 2013 (the same day of Jobson’s birthday), in both double-CD and deluxe 4-disc boxed set editions. Little Boy and Watch me bleed (by Tears For Fears) are two featured songs in “Encore Little Boy—Confession Suite”, for many reasons that Sumika could not choose other photos only this photo as the best “face” of this VU Suite.

Coincidence Has Its Own Meaning

巧合自有其深意

這支組曲,以挪威音樂組合洛伊薩普樂團Röyksopp的”What Else Is There?”(〈還有什麼?〉)為第一首歌,以Cold樂團的”Confession”(〈告白、懺悔〉)做為尾聲。Sumika於2012年10/29當週第一次聆聽當時,寫下這支組曲的輪廓是︰”不曾遠離戰場”組曲—Band on the run。

到了2013年,Sumika來到醫院檢查時,正巧當週地下絲絨VU Live House官網又播放這支組曲,寫給Jobson而始終未寄出的信件裡,巧合地又寫到「戰場」。但當時Sumika還不知道組曲裡有一首歌名提到醫院。英國前衛搖滾樂團Egg的” A Visit to Newport Hospital”(〈訪問新港醫院〉),雖然歌曲本身寫的是樂團成軍相關的故事.雖然這封信始終沒有寄給Jobson…。

許多巧合,誠如心理學家所指出的,巧合裡自有深意……。以Sumika的語言來說,這種無意的巧合,是一種「共構存有」的存在,尤其是多年後,後知後覺,更凸顯了當初的無心巧然,如同完美的默契共謀。

Sumika在2012年最初將它命名為《Encore—Band On the Run組曲》,並成為Sumika所編列Jobson的第17支絲絨組曲。幾年後Sumika將組曲名稱修改為Encore little boy—Confession組曲》(Encore little boy—Confession Suite”)。Lebowski的”Encore”,是又一朵Jobson贈送Sumika的絲絨「玫瑰」,也是本組曲命名的由來之一…。直到2019年Jobson始終未命名這支組曲。

在《Encore—Band On The Run組曲》這支絲絨組曲中,”Confession”(「告白、懺悔」)這個字眼出現兩次,第一次是出現在選曲Busted歌詞裡,第二次出現在組曲最後一首Cold樂團的 ”Confession” 歌名。這也是後來Sumika將原組曲名稱改為“Encore little boy—Confession suite”的原因之一。

另一個巧合是,這支組曲Jobson選的第三首歌是Christophe Goze所唱的” Little Boy”(小男孩),而被選為第18首歌的”Watch Me Bleed”,出自Tears for Fears樂團的The Hurting專輯,Jobson個人臉書Jobson Hiiao facebook幾年後更換成目前的個人頭像,正是Tears for Fears樂團The Hurting專輯小男孩的封面。

17 VU Suite Encore little boy – Confession Suite with titles (3)

後來Sumika為每支絲絨組曲設計的組曲封面圖像,這支《Encore Little Boy –Confession Suite》的圖像裡也蘊涵了深意:

左面,是騰空房屋的影像,雖是出自這支組曲第一首歌Röyksopp的”What Else Is There?”的官方MV,Sumika選擇以這棟騰空解體的房屋,藉以隱喻台北地下絲絨搖滾餐廳受到房東誠品企業以暴力橫奪,而被迫關店(the hurting)的命運。右方圖像的對照,Sumika選擇這位坐著低頭掩面的小男孩,Jobson Hiiao既拿這張當成辨識他個人臉書身份的圖像,就是他用以自況比喻的形象(雖然小男孩和他本人實際年紀來說,差距太大了,有點蘿莉大叔賣萌裝可愛之嫌)。

同時,在2012年,Sumika曾在信裡稱Jobson是「超齡男孩」,當時這個從台灣幾位五年級當代藝術家靈感而來的形容詞,還惹來Jobson小小的不悅。這是刺點嗎?Jobson不曉得,在Sumika眼中的他,雖是熱愛搖滾,玩世不恭的浪子,但也是難得還保有一丁點純真心靈的搖滾小男孩——在這支組曲的意義,則同時雙重隱喻著他是這棟受害房屋的擁有者——台北地下絲絨搖滾餐廳的主人Jobson,人們口中的蕭先生。

A Visit to Newport Hospital在組曲的順序,前有Lebowski的”Encore”,後有America樂團的’Three Roses”的清新輕快,其在組曲的位置,和前後兩首相互烘托。在1971年當時,這首前衛搖滾的編曲和淺顯直白的歌詞,令人耳目一新。現在再抽出來單曲聆賞,依然很耐聽,不失引領風潮的英倫前衛搖滾本色。

One day there is life quote of “Invention of Solitude”, Paul Auster  Sumika letter to Jobson (1)

Sumika在多封信件提到的《孤獨及其所創造的》,是保羅.奧斯特(Paul Auster, 1947- )的自傳式小說,是經Jobson推薦後Sumika才接觸閱讀的書之一。後來他又陸續向Sumika推薦了好幾本他讀過的小說…

1982年發表的《孤獨及其所創造的》是保羅.奧斯特創作的基礎,他一切故事的原點。書中的〈記憶之書〉,是繼第一章〈一個隱形人的畫像〉之後的第二章。保羅.奧斯特具多重身分,既是著名小說家、詩人、劇作家、譯者,也是電影導演、美國藝術與文學院院士。他的作品特有的疏離感和冷峻,讓Sumika欣賞玩味,融合了存在主義和懸疑小說等元素,被視為美國當代最具創新性的小說家。保羅.奧斯特著作等身,小說代表作為《紐約三部曲》(The New York Trilogy),新近的作品是耗費七年寫作的小說《4 3 2 1》(2017)。他與南非諾貝爾文學獎得主柯慈的書信交流結集成書:《此刻》(Here and Now: Letters, 2008-2011 (2013A collection of letters exchanged with J.M. Coetzee) 。 

Sumika未寄之信系列 說明 About “B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika" 

【B面絲絨—Sumika寫給Jobson未寄之信系列】是Sumika寫給Jobson卻不曾寄給Jobson的信件。這些文字,其實可回溯自2012年Sumika認識Jobson之時,這系列不歸在【象牙門之夢】單元,因為是書信體,且以絲絨主人Jobson為收信人對象的文字,屬於Jobson與Sumika倆人絲絨故事中另一種未曾抵達的書信交流(倆人之間書信交流的關鍵詞: 瑪拉利卡 = malalikap)。

Sumika親筆所寫而沒有寄給Jobson的信件,2014年之後仍然持續寫了很多封,直到在此網站【絲絨之問】發表之前,從未曝光。收件人Jobson不知道這些信件的存在,當然也未曾讀過Sumika寫給他的這些信件。

 

Lyrics of “A Visit to Newport Hospital”歌詞如下

There used to be a time when we lived in the van
We used to loon about with Janice, Liza and Ann
Now looking back it seemed to be a happy time
And so we kid ourselves we didn’t really mind
The hang-ups and the lack of bread

There were four of us then, the group was Uriel
We played five nights a week at Ryde Castle Hotel
We spent our time avoiding skinheads and the law
It was a freedom that we’d never felt before
And now we’re doing this instead

It was a way of life that was completely new
And so we found that we had quite a lot to do
The time passed slowly and each day was much the same
We ate and loved and slept and no-one was to blame
For saying things better left unsaid

 

請參照︰Jobson的地下絲絨搖滾餐廳VU Live House官網、《絲絨漫談》單元Jobson發表的文章及VU Live House Facebook及Jobson Hiiao 臉書與組曲相關至今發表的內容。另請參照Sumika撰寫【托住眾生的靈魂—組曲大師Jobson的絲絨組曲】單元的組曲介紹。

Cf.

B面絲絨—Sumika寫給Jobson未寄之信系列 B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika (16 July, 2013)

第 530000 位絲絨的幸運聽眾 Being the 530000th Lucky audience of VU Live House Taipei Official Website (S的第219封信) 13/07/2013

將靜默贈予聆聽之前──獻給親愛的 Jobson (S的第138封信) 27/10/2012

象牙門之夢28 同向而往 Go ahead the same direction with you 28/10/2012

將靜默贈予聆聽之前──獻給親愛的 Jobson (S的第143-144封信) 30-31/10/2012

將靜默贈予聆聽之前──獻給親愛的 Jobson (S的第146封信) 3/11/2012

象牙門之夢29 縮限聆聽 Reduced Listening 3/11/2012

♫*♥*•ღ♫••**ღ¨♥*••♫•♥*ღ♫••¨*♥*♫*ღ•¨*♥*•ღ♫•♥*¨*♫

 

6 Replies to “B面絲絨—Sumika寫給Jobson未寄之信系列 B-side VU—Series of unsent letters to Jobson from Sumika (6 August, 2013)”

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